No matter how you serve it up, “fake it ’til you make it” is harmful. I get the idea, but it’s harmful to the people who fake it for several reasons, not the least of which is reinforcement that they are not good enough as they are. Faking it can also lead to someone leading a double life in which deception and omission become the order of the day. Faking it is also dangerous to the people with whom we are in a relationship. Dishonesty is the enemy of trust, and trust is the foundation of any relationship.
It is easy to fall prey to our own egos that tell us we don’t measure up, and to nudge the truth just enough to make us feel better. But the footing on that slope is slippery, and there’s a dangerous cliff closer than we realize.
I can’t say this often or clearly enough: Healthy relationships are based on open and honest communication. This isn’t only referring to long term relationships of an intimate variety, but to friendships as well.
Never forget that I love you, and that excludes no one.